I saw this thread on Twitter (yes, I’m still calling it that!) the other day for poor or working class writers. It’s geared towards screenwriters but I still found lots of useful tidbits in there, including this:
(Here’s a link to the full thread in case you want to check it out. I couldn’t embed it – is this a Twitter vs Substack thing??)
Before I even realised writing and illustrating are the things I want to do forever, I spent a lot of time over the years asking myself this very question. I would run through employment options, look up websites about different careers and roles that might be suited to me, and each and every time I’d think, hey, maybe I can do that!
A classroom full of 3-4-year-olds singing songs, playing in the sandpit, painting, colouring, and exploring sounds fun! And of course I can deal with the not-so-fun nappy changing, toilet training, messy eating, crying etc. that also comes along with all that.
Then I’d think about doing that day in, day out long-term, and I’d feel a little sick.
I had an epiphany as a young teen when I thought, oh, I know what I want to do when I’m an adult! I excitedly told my mum that when I grow up I want to help people. Doing what exactly? I had no clue. Just something where I could ‘help’, obvs.
I kind of did work towards that with my uni degree too. I completed a Bachelor of Social Science and imagined I’d work in the welfare sector.
Working within an organisation that provides services to those in need sounds incredibly fulfilling! Can I deal with the stress and feeling of helplessness when there’s something I can’t provide? Will I still feel fulfilled when coming up against bureaucratic red tape while trying to help people? Hmm … I’m not so sure.
I’d think about doing that day in, day out long-term, and I’d feel a little sick.
It’s not that I think those kinds of jobs are SO awful I could never ever do them and how can anyone else?? It’s that doing that job for a long time doesn’t fill me with any kind of contentment or happiness. It makes me feel anxious and overwhelmed, and yes, sick.
That’s how I’d know those weren’t really the right choices for me.
I recognise that having the choice and ability to work a creative job that I love makes me privileged. I am incredibly grateful and I know it’s not possible for everyone. I’m LUCKY to be in this position.
But what I’m getting at with this post is that if the thought of writing, illustrating, creating, or whatever it is that you might be trying to do right now, doesn’t fill you with contentment to imagine doing it forever, then maybe it’s not the right thing for you.
If you aren’t okay with the ups AND the downs that come with that work, then maybe it’s not the right thing for you.
My creative endeavours fill me with contentment when I think of doing them all the time forever and forever, but that doesn’t mean that my time spent on them is always fun times and rainbows.
Do I still get anxious? Yes. Do I still get frustrated when I make mistakes or can’t quite get the words or the images ‘right’? Yes. Do I still question whether my work is good enough for anyone to ever read or see? Hell yes. But do I keep working and keep wanting to come back to writing and illustrating despite those things? A million times yes.
That’s how I know it’s the thing for me because I can’t do anything else and feel this way.
If you can think of something else that does fill you with contentment and happiness then do that thing, just as pastfuturebrett says. ‘If no, then back to work.’
Are you doing the thing (or things) that bring/s you happiness and contentment? Or can you imagine doing something else and being happy?
Here’s a little guy I forgot to share in my last post. A couple months back I had to slow my car down for an echidna to cross the road. It was the cutest thing and I just had to paint the little guy.
(I used watercolour and gouache plus coloured pencil.)
Yanu (bye) for now!
I acknowledge the Darkinyung people as the Traditional Custodians of the land on which I live and work, and I pay my respects to the Elders past and present.
I could connect so deeply with your words! I am an author, but I've been trying to practice my art, because I love thinking visually, and doodling has always been my thing. So while I wait for the extremely slow publishing industry to send me good news, I've been finding great joy in learning to illustrate!
I think I am, at least in terms of hobbies. Right now, I just want to find a job I can do that gives me some income!